My beating heart in my chest.
I place my hand upon your chest.
Profoundly beating the hearts intertwine.
A rhythm that sings for all of time.
Finger tips trail, oh so gently with little nail.
Hands touch as darkness around becomes blinded.
Blinded by something of a purest form.
Eyes meet, widen, in complete intoxication.
Time becomes steady.
You feel the Earth as it rotates.
Space around you closes in.
Nothing but you and I.
You and I, in our skin.
Words are not needed here.
Our bodies do all the talking.
Your senses heighten.
Clothes fall to the ground.
Chins touch, and lips collide, quivering.
In this moment, you feel yourself taken back.
Suddenly you’re a whole room apart.
But the moment is still there.
Run into each other, lips collide again, bodies intertwine.
An explosion, of passion.
Two becomes One.
The Planets bend between us.
As the smoke settles.
Time is still.
The voice whispers but it’s also loud.
Glazed eyes, staring right through you.
Another world beyond them.
Where does it lead?
Where do you go?
Take my hand, trust me.
Now I will show and talk you about this piece and poem.
The poem, I originally titled “Love” I actually feel there probably is a better name though.
I wrote it quite a few weeks ago, if it’s not obvious I wrote it for someone in particular, and it was only theirs to keep, I wanted it to be for them only.
As time went by I found myself wanting to share it more, I was really proud of it but also I thought to myself if you cannot share your feelings with the world what’s the point, I wasn’t’ ashamed of them, but something felt nice about it being their own little secret.
The basis of the poem was an expressions of my feelings towards them whilst we were together, that’s not to say the feelings aren’t still valid, because they are, but it’s a different story now.
I am finding it’s difficult to explain poetry, often I write what comes to my head when I think about subject, it’s often non tangential and I have to piece it together.
So bear with me…
I suppose I won’t deny the poem at one point describes an intimate moment with them, and what leads up to it, but it’s not dirty or anything like that, it’s just a pure moment.
When we were together, even the slightest kiss would send my heart racing, when we laid still I could often feel it through my chest, as we kissed I would feel time slow down, I didn’t care for the world around me, it felt like I was on another planet, I would get this sensation that it was just me and her in an empty room, we’d be in a corner each and we’d just run at each other and explode, obviously that never happened but it’s how it felt, we’d often cuddle after, though not always, but when we did I felt like we’d become one, just one soul, and if you took the moment to look into her eyes, they’d be as wide as the galaxy, intoxicated, and intoxicating to look at, I saw little galaxies beyond and I wondered what she thought when she looked at me. She had difficult expressing herself sometimes, like myself, so I wanted her to trust me, take my hand and show me. I always dreamt of her trusting me enough to share her true feelings.
I guess that is the poem summarized as best as I can.
So why are you sharing it now when you wanted it to be hers, well I’ve doing a lot of painting lately, and I will post them up actually, because I have shared more on my Instagram lately than on here.
So yeah been doing a lot of painting, well it’s not really painting it’s more throwing shit at a canvas, as I have been exploring my creative side, I have based some paintings on themes in my life, I thought i’d really like to do one based on my poem and by proxy for her. I told her I had planned on doing it, and should she wish to keep it afterward it is hers, she said she would like to keep, she didn’t have to of course and I wouldn’t have minded if she didn’t want it.
Now this is first time I have ever made a painting for someone because I actually wanted to, i’d done paintings for people before but only because they asked me, and they picked their own colours, so effectively it was meaningless.
This was different, it’s the the first time I have painted with a poem as a reference too, it was something I felt I really had to do regardless of the current situation, I was doing it for myself, in a way too difficult to explain.
So after a long busy day, I finally got the moment to set up a work site in my garden, I bought lots of new paints, I’ve spent about £200+ on canvases and paints recently, oops!
I had a plan for this one, well some of a plan, I can tell you that I never really plan my paintings I never have, but this one was different, I had a vague idea how I wanted it to look.
The paintings actually has many layers and paints, they each bare meaning to me.
I’ll take you through it step by step.
The initial base is a coat of silver, something shiny, there is a reason for this, and i’ll get to it shortly, I spray this on with a can of spray paint I had it actually ran out near the end and I had to get my back up!
I added a layer of blue, for this I used a spray bottle of diluted acrylic and water solution, the blue is the galaxies I see in her eyes when she looks at me, the feeling of being on another planet, completely outer worldly. Though her eyes were brown I saw something different entirely.
I then add red, that’s simple that’s love, passion, my heart. Well I guess that’s not simple really.
I add some tones of black and blue mix, I wanted a darker blue, something to make the background appear more like a galaxy, the center piece would be the explosion on passion in the middle of space.
The silver comes in here, I want it seem like stars in the sky. I suppose in the finished piece it isn’t too visible but in the making off video you can see it.
I added some acrylic inks by dripping them around the edges, I used red and a light blue, I wanted it to feel like all these emotions were just pouring into the frame uncontrollably.
I spray on some more diluted blue acrylic solution, I want it to be bright, this isn’t a dark piece like some of my paintings.
I start throwing on some reds now, I want to give it some texture for when it dries, so I thought thick blobs of paint on it.
Afterwards I apply more ink to drip around the other edges and let them drip enough.
I throw on more red and then some blue, I use different shades of each to give it more contrast and vibrancy, after all I was only working with select colours I felt relevant.
I throw on some white, it’s pure and I associate it with time, stillness and something of a purest form, and though there isn’t much it’s very clear in the painting.
I continue throwing and slicing on layers of blue and red, continuing with the different shades.
I add yellow, for her favourite colour, I think it adds something nice to it, something from her.
I eventually turn the painting on it’s front so I can spread droplets onto the canvas.
I shake and spin the canvas to blend and spread the paint, everything becomes one and intertwined, entangled.
I continue splattering on paint making an explosion of passion at the epicenter of the painting.
Unfortunately when I had finished, I turned my camera off and a huge gust of wind came and swept my painting off, some of it was ruined, not badly but I had to add more over the top I was quite upset as I was really pleased with my piece.
I finished it off adding more blue and yellow, I still like it.
I think I shall wait for it to dry and add another layer of blue and more drips down the side it’ll be interesting to see what it does when it’s dry, I will make it perfect, or maybe i’ll leave it as it is, I shall sleep on it.
I hope you can understand how I have used to poem as a reference for my method as well.
She was pleased with it and said she’d hang it on her wall when she gets back home.
So I guess everyone is happy.
Thank you, I hope you enjoyed our journey into my painting and poem!